Dear Sex Answers:

I need some help I married this woman who is younger then me she is great in bed but she says she can be a lot better if I talk dirty to her tell me some of things I should say to her. I love her dearly and I want to make the happiest that I can.

Anonymous


 

Anonymous -

It's great that you and your wife are communicating about her likes and wishes and that you're eager to please her! :-)

Consider this like you are learning a new language - I'll throw in a few key phrases and thoughts to get you started and once you see what she responds to you'll be able to gauge her likes and build from there.

Some women who like dirty talk in the bedroom want to feel like the naughty girl. Saying things like "Who's naughty girl are you" and "tell me how you like it" are easy first steps.

You can prompt her more with "do you want me to ____ that ___ ??"  I'll let you fill in the blanks because there are a multitude of  things you can use to fill in the blanks with this sentence alone :-)

"tell me how bad you want it ... (pausing) i'm not going to give it to you until you do" this is great "teasing" talk ... and good foreplay - which may give her more time to build up the intensity.

Another one I like is "let me hear you say my name as i go in deeper ... no ... louder, come on baby.... say it, no scream it like you mean it" .... (you can work this sentence alone for a few minutes and it will require interaction by you both so that you don't feel like you're going solo here. :-)

These are just a few ideas to help get things started with your wife. She may open up and tell you more of what she wants to hear once you initiate the dirty talk, so be ready!!!

At least she's telling you and not laying there fantasizing
about voices in her head :-)

You may feel awkward at first, but with your willingness to please her as your main goal, I trust you'll be speaking your new 2nd language in no time!

And obviously, check out the book that Michael and I wrote on Dirty Talking to Women

TiKi

Dear Anonymous -

Bravo to you for listening to your wife and aiming to please her.

You can focus a lot of your dirty talk on praising her.  This not only gets her hot and moist but it makes her feel great about herself.

Some examples:

"Your breasts are oh, so soft and delicious"

"Ohhh, I love how warm and moist your cunt feels around my cock"

"You make my dick so hard and hot. I can't wait to make love to you"

"I just love touching your gorgeous body.  I want to hump that beautiful body so much."

Keep in mind that your language needs to match what she is comfortable with.  While 4 letter words can (and are) rude in general day-to-day conversations, when they are used in the bedroom, they are often acceptable and desired by those who don't like "foul" language. 

Most women are probably ok with "I so want to fuck your dripping pussy with my hard cock" (assuming the tone of voice is endearing, not thug-like)  The words are used in their "proper" manner. 

However, a phrase like "you fucking bitch - eat my meat" is derogatory and off-putting to most women. "Whore" is another term that you should use with caution as its "proper" meaning is anything but flattering.  Have fun!

Michael -  author of Dirty Talking Secrets

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