Dear Michael -

I am so fond of ur regular tips. They are very useful to serious couples who want to improve on their intimate relationships. I am always curious about one thing. Do women make noises while making love in reality or it is only shown in x rated movies. As far as my wife is concerned she does not make any noises or sound while making love or during arousal. Please inform me on this part.

Thanks,
D.

Dear D. -

Women usually don't watch porn so they don't know how they are supposed to behave in bed :)   Actually, I'm a little bit serious.  I'll bet that at least 80% of men wish their women would moan, sigh, breath heavily and let talk to them "dirty" in bed.  From what I can gather from online research (and from polling my subscribers), there is a small minority of women who are vocally expressive in bed. 

So women, if you want to excite your man in an incredible way, learn how to be more vocal in the sack.  If you need assistance, a great little book on How to Talk Dirty.  I highly suggest it.

Reader's responses:

In response to the question about women making noises in bed during lovemaking. I am in the minority. More often than not, I moan and express my pleasure to my husband. Sometimes I have to be careful not to be too loud, so the kids don't hear. And when the kids aren't home, I can let loose and get as loud as I want. I also watch porn, I find it a turn on.
So ladies, a word of advise. Your man will love it more if you vocally express yourselves in bed. Even if it's just moaning, it will tell him that he is doing something right.

.............

I had to smile when I read the context of the question and then went to your site to read the answer. I am lucky/blessed to have a girlfriend who gets vocal if I simply give her a handjob! I asked her once why she is so vocal. She said she can't help it. The emotional contact that physical touch has with has to be described in some way. Her way is to moan and most of her moans are not low tones, but rather are higher pitched. I often think I could amplify her sounds and play them on a loudspeaker to keep the deer away as I drive down the road!

On the serious note, some women don't know or realize that they limit the one talent they use the most of the time: their voice! Especially during sex. At all other times, they use it communicate their wishes, desires, etc. Maybe you would be so daring to show the uneducated what more there is to sex...as in talking and moaning...and making noise.

..............

Michael, I am also one of those women who make love noisily. I love it when the kids aren't around because I can be free to make as much noise as I like. I had never watched porn so I didn't know that was how women in the movies behaved, it just feels good to articulate what I am feeling. My husband does love it - we have talked about it often and he tells me that he loves knowing he is pleasing me.

About three years he asked me to start talking dirty to him in the bedroom. It was admittedly, a little hard at first, but now I love doing it. Not all the time and there are times when the intensity of the language varies, but it really does spice things up!

I would recommend to any women out there that they try making noise, or telling their spouses they like what they are doing. I also highly recommend that they try using some language - they may get the best love-making session of their lives as a result!

Cori

..............

I don't watch porn, never have, never will. However, I'm extremely vocal (in fact, my husband and I joke that he'll be deaf in one of his ears when we are old because I'm so loud, but what better way to go deaf!) For me, it's simply what comes naturally. Some women aren't comfortable with making noise, and that's fine. It certainly doesn't mean that her husband is doing anything wrong. Lovemaking is about what makes both of you comfortable and feel loved, not about the level of noise.